A humble word of advice, on behalf of brides and grooms...

At recent weddings, I have found many of our couples thrown for a loop by unexpected guests attending their wedding. Wedding guests who bring an unaccounted for date, or last minute attendees who fail to RSVP can cause a lot of heartache for couples, especially since table assignments, stationery items, favors, meals, even centerpieces, linen, and budgets are set according to the "final" guest list. If invited to attend a wedding, please note whether the invitation states "and guest," and please be sure to respond whether able to attend or not. This step will only help brides and grooms to have a stress-less wedding day.

Brides and grooms: to minimize the likelihood of this happening, start contacting the guests who have not responded from the day that responses are due. The more certain you are of who is expected to attend, the less likely it will be that "surprise" guests appear at your wedding. Happy planning!

Remember Your Officiant

Photo by Geralyn Camarillo of Hokuli'i Images.

Your wedding day. Its the day that many have been planning and dreaming about for at least the past few months. All of your check lists have been made and you are slowly working through it. You look at the guest list and see all your loved ones coming...your favorite aunty from the mainland, a best friend from Japan, and of course, the minister that has known you since preschool days.

Depending on the couple, their officiant could be the minister they always see every Sunday during mass or be a reverend that they have chosen for their special occasion. It is up to the couple as to how involved they want the officiant to be; below are some ways an officiant can feel more included in the wedding.

When figuring out what table to place your officiant at during the reception, consider placing him or her at your parents' table. It will make him or her included in your family and gives him or her a rightful place as a VIG (very important guest). After all, this could be a person of the clergy, or someone that has known your family for years and may have even been the one performing the wedding ceremony for your parents.

Another way to include the officiant in this happy event is to send him or her a formal invitation. This way, the officiant will feel more like a guest of the wedding and family member rather than just one more vendor amongst the crowd. It will certainly add a special and thoughtful touch.

Finally, consider a lei for the officiant. Lei represent a gift from the heart and also signify an honored person or guest, particularly at social gatherings. This simple gesture is a beautiful extension of aloha (but check first, if the ceremony is to take place in a religious setting, just in case the giving of lei to the officiant is deemed inappropriate.)